Not exactly sure where this blog post is going to lead too.
There is so much going on in my sleep deprived brain right now.
Things have been so hard with Abbi for what seems like forever but it has probably been closer to about a month. Teething, ear infections, head colds, growth spurts, etc.......
end result being she is NOT sleeping!!
If she is not sleeping that means either Clay or myself is not sleeping.
For many a night Clay is in charge of waking up with her. I have honestly been very selfish. As I explain to him for 5+ years I have not only carried a baby in my belly (which all of us women know = NO SLEEP), I have woken up with each baby every night all night while nursing, etc...... Like I also explained to Clay I woke Clay up maybe 2 times when Jacob was a newborn, saw he was of no assistance (not trying to be rude but he was really no help) and never woke him again for any of the rest!
Well except the time Carly shot poop in my mouth!
Anyways, thats another blog maybe some day.
So in my brain I thought
"if he wakes up with Abbi now there will be even less chance that #6 will be mentioned"
therefore Clay gets up most nights with Abbi. Let me also state that my husband is awesome with being Daddy in the middle of the night, me not so much unless it is nursing baby, but once they are older Clay does much better being woken up then I do. It takes me a few minutes to snap into mom mode.
Ok so things have been tough recently with Abbi and it has caused some serious stress on our marriage. He wants me waking up, I want him waking up, we BOTH WANT ABBI SLEEPING!!
We just do not know what is wrong.
Countless trips to the doctor.
Countless different medicines to try and fix ears or teething or whatever.
We are both just done with no hope in sight.
This morning I took over at 2am and also did the 6am and sort of had a come to Jesus and decided it wont be like this for long, its just a phase. SHE IS OUR LAST BABY!! We need to just find joy in all of these last baby moments instead of having negative memories to look back on. I want to look back and know we loved her through it all and enjoyed her through it all.
UPDATE!!!
First sorry for never hitting PUBLISH on this post!! It was the sleep deprivation!!
I can say (while knocking on wood) Abbi did not wake at all last night!! And for the two nights before last she only woke 1 time each night!! Clay and I are back on track and LOVING like team players!! I love my husband!! He has been the best gift God could have ever given me! We go through some rough patches but we always come out so much stronger!!!
Well, here I am, your mother, and my 2cents. Lack of sleep is terrible, I understand as does every mother. This mother of yours is 65 & I can honestly tell you and all the other young Mom's who read this that something happens to the brain as the kids grow up (& leave the nest.....just kidding) YOU FORGET the bad stuff and you remember the GOOD! Any Grannies who want to chime in here, please do! I don't remember getting up in the middle of the night w you kids except when you were sick and I can't forget the tears I cried wishing it was me instead.
ReplyDeleteYou forget the spilled milk, changing diapers, all the feedings, bottles & sippy cups...you remember the hugs, smiles, cuddles, and all the good stuff....I wish I could do all that over! I miss having you kids under foot as I tried to do projects...life with the 5 of you around was totally the best.
You are real busy now.....stop and smell the roses!! Enjoy!!! It is over so fast & you will remember these years as the BEST as long as you live.....AMEN!
AMEN!!!
DeleteI love you mom!!
Just this morning 2 more of mine went to the doctor. 1 is now napping and 1 is sitting on the couch with a breathing machine!
Motherhood! Gotta just love it!
I am putting this in black and white now MINE ARE NEVER LEAVING THIS NEST!! Not going to think about it! Therefore NO #6!! ;)